


Save Me, I’m Lost

by malecnificenttyrus11



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst w/hopeful ending, Bobby Nash (mentioned) - Freeform, Broken!Buck, Buddie angst, Christopher Diaz (mentioned) - Freeform, Desperate!Eddie, Evan “Buck” Buckley - Freeform, Implied Feelings, Lost!Buck, buddie, comforting!eddie, eddie diaz - Freeform, lawsuit, post 3x03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-16
Updated: 2019-10-16
Packaged: 2020-12-17 07:06:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21050312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malecnificenttyrus11/pseuds/malecnificenttyrus11
Summary: It had been two weeks.Two weeks. 14 Days. 336 hours.Since Buck had any contact with anyone from the 118. Two weeks since Buck was crushed by the realization that his team, friends, family, had been working against him. Two weeks since Buck made the decision to do anything he could to get his job back, even if that meant losing everyone that mattered to him.Will a visit from an unexpected visitor be enough tomake Buck reconsider his decision?





	Save Me, I’m Lost

It had been two weeks.

Two weeks. 14 Days. 336 hours.

Since Buck had any contact with anyone from the 118. Two weeks since Buck was crushed by the realization that his team, friends, family, had been working against him. Two weeks since Buck made the decision to do anything he could to get his job back, even if that meant losing everyone that mattered to him.

Not that he mattered to them anyway.

The only person who’d consistently tried to get ahold of him was Eddie, and he’d even avoided him all together. 

He had to do what the lawyer said, even if it killed him to push away the people he cared about.

Buck looks at the clock on his bedside table. 3AM. It was 3AM and Buck still hadn’t been able to go to sleep. His mind was spinning, a thousand thoughts keeping him awake.

Buck is dragged out of his thoughts by a knock at his door. He furrows his brows together in confusion.

Who would be at his door at 3AM? 

Buck sighs, sliding out of his bed, carrying himself down the stairs and in the direction of the door. He unlocks the door, opening it.

His eyes widen.

“Eddie? What are you doing here?” Buck breathes out. Eddie frowns.

“You haven’t returned my calls or texts in nearly two weeks. We need to talk.” Eddie says.

Buck remembers the orders of his lawyer, “Eddie...you shouldn’t be here. You can’t be here. With everything going on.” Buck whispers.

Eddie shakes his head, “Buck, I don’t care about what’s going on. I needed to see you, and I’m not leaving until we talk.”

Buck sighs, opening the door and gesturing for Eddie to enter the apartment. Eddie lets out a sigh of relief, walking past Buck.

Buck closes the door, following Buck into the living room. The air is tense, and a deafening silence falls between them.

“Buck...why are you doing this?” Eddie speaks up finally, voice quiet.

Buck sighs, “Eddie, I’m pretty sure Bobby already filled you in on the whole lawsuit thing, so-“

Eddie shakes his head, “Buck...that’s not what I’m talking about right now. Why are you pushing me away? Avoiding me?” he asks, voice laced with hurt.

Buck frowns, “Eddie...I had no choice. My lawyer told me that it would compromise my case to have contact from anyone at the 118. That includes you.”

Eddie laughs bitterly, avoiding Buck’s eyes, “And you actually would agree to that.”

Buck is silent, looking at the ground.

“Buck, you know...I think you’re an idiot for suing the city, and Bobby. But, I understand why you feel like you need to do this. What I don’t understand, however, is why you wouldn’t consider how this would hurt me. Hurt Christopher.”

Buck flinches at the mention of Christopher’s name, his eyes widening. He hadn’t even thought of Christopher, and how he wouldn’t be able to have contact with him either, because of his association to the 118.

“You know...Chris has been asking where you’ve been. Why he hasn’t been able to spend time with ‘his Buck’.” Eddie explains.

Buck frowns, avoiding Eddie’s eyes.

Eddie sighs, turning to pace away from Buck, “He’s been having nightmares ever since the Tsunami. He just screams, and cries, all night long. And then he asks for you, worries about you,” Eddie whispers, “And my heart breaks because...how do I tell a broken kid that one of his favorite people is choosing to not be around him?”

A tear falls down Buck’s face. He wipes it away quickly, trying to hold himself together.

“Eddie, I-“ Buck whispers, but Eddie interrupts him, “What am I supposed to tell him, Buck? That kid adores you. And he’s gone through so much...lost so many people in his life. I don’t think he can handle it again.”

Buck frowns, exhaling a shaky breath. 

“Eddie, I-I’m sorry.” Buck says, voice cracking. 

Eddie turns around to face Buck, their eyes finally meeting.

“God, Buck...I want to be supportive of you. I want to tell you everything is going to be okay. At the same time, I want to tell you what an idiot you are. And I want to beg you not to go through with this because Chris needs you. I need you, Buck.” Eddie confesses.

Buck loses it in that moment, letting out a sob. 

Eddie’s eyes widen. He immediately walks forward, pulling Buck into his arms. Buck lets out a sob, grabbing onto Eddie’s shirt in an attempt to ground himself. 

“Buck, it’s going to be okay. Shh...” Eddie comforts him.

Buck shakes his head, pulling away from the embrace to look at Eddie.

“I don’t think it is, Eddie. I don’t think I can go through with this lawsuit anymore. I didn’t realize how much I have to lose.” Buck admits, sniffling.

Eddie grabs Buck’s shoulder, “Buck. More people care than you think. Whether you realize it or not,   
The team cares about you. Bobby is just trying to protect you. He loves you like a son, Buck. None of us want to put you in danger, and none of us want to worry about losing you.”

Buck frowns, “I didn’t see it that way.”

Eddie shrugs, “That’s okay. You’ve gone through hell...nobody blames you for how you are feeling. But I want you to know that you aren’t alone.”

Buck sniffles again, nodding. 

“I’m so sorry, Eddie. For pushing you away, and for hurting Christopher. God...you have no idea how much I love you guys. You are my family. I won’t let anything take that away from me.” Buck says with such certainty that it makes Eddie’s eyes widen.

“We aren’t going anywhere, Buck. Me, Christopher, the team. Any of us. Not as long as you’ll keep us around.” Eddie says, smiling softly at him.

Buck nods, finally able to smile for the first time in nearly two weeks.

Buck sighs, “Eddie...I don’t know how to fix any of this. I feel lost.”

Eddie squeezes Buck’s shoulder, “Hey. We’re going to get through this together. Let me help you save you.” Eddie asks.

Buck nods, pulling Eddie into another embrace.

Fixing this situation wouldn’t be easy. Hell, it would be anything but. But the pain would be worth it, because nothing would take away Buck’s family.


End file.
